the waiting game

George sat staring into his reflection in a bird bath while smoking a big fat cigar.

of course that was not all he had smoke that evening, twilight had come sooner than expected, and so his appearance was murky, he couldn’t quite make out his eyes, his lips.


He heard laughter and yelling from another part of the lawn. “Jesus will you shut the fuck up Korey? You are going to damage my brain cells one by one with your incessant fucking snorting shit talking voice. It’s just NOISE to my ears. Not one sound that comes out of your mouth is pleasant. Give me some fucking space. I need to think.”

George sat in a lawn chair by the pool and looked up into the sky.

Alexa sat next to him and started singing, “Everything, is going to be alright, everything is going to be alright, everything is going to be ALRIGHTTTTT!”

George grabbed the throw pillow and threw it in her face and then threw the cigar in the pool. “You too, you little fucker! I need quiet”

Alexa came over and layed on his chair and looked at the moon, and laughed, “Hey Goerge?” She pointed at the moon, “What fucking planet do you think that is?”

He glared right into her eyes and she just looked there so innocently and just kissed him and then they made out and then it was off with the pants and into the pool and just everything became murky.

The next morning George woke up with Alexa in his large room. Everything was black and red and it seemed as though he had everything.

No one knew what he was always thinking about. But George knew, he knew and he couldn’t keep it to himself for much longer. He was really stressed and fucked and he knew this fantasy was about to end and the stress was getting to him.

a beginning of something to write.

a teenage boy named colin laying in bed hears his alarm go off and sits up and stars the viewer in the face. he looks stunned. his hair is disheveled and he is wearing a white t shirt that says, ‘If you eat me, I’ll get bigger.’

Colin: Fuck. Not again. Not another stupid day.

Colin’s Mom: (yells from downstairs) Breakfast is ready, that is if you want a banana! Get out of bed! It’s time for school. Don’t make me come up there!

Colin: Fuck.

Colin is generally known as the sexiest guy at his school but he is a bad boy and he is bisexual so people have mixed feelings about him. Colin rolls out of bed and has a very large boner.

Colin is now wearing pants and is downstairs in the kitchen where his mother is wearing a silk robe which is parted and so he can see her entire naked body. She is fucking a random guy and Colin has no idea where he came from. Colin is generally turned on by this behavior and likes to encourage it. He grabs a banana and walks out of the house fantasizing about several different things.

When Colin arrives at school several different people grab different parts of his body and he is pretty turned on at this point. He decides to make a statement.

Colin: Does anyone know where Candace is?

Joe: Who’s Candace?

Colin: Candace Baker?? She’s SMOKING hot.

Mike: I don’t know a Candace Baker.

Colin: Well you should. Canned Ice, helps you get baked. I need to get high, right here, right now, then I need to get laid.

Devon: (female) Me and my girls got you. We will hook you up.

Colin: So I smoked it, and I snorted it. Now I wait.

Devon: What are you waiting for?

Colin: your body.

This was all happening on the front lawn of the school.

Squinting up at the bright light, Krystal pulled her sunglasses down to shield her eyes. Her hair a wavy mess of reds, blues, purples, and sparkles, Krystal was a galaxy of someone who was trying to look different. She wanted to stand out in the crowd. She imagined herself walking in slow motion, cameras flashing, everyone looking at her. She had always walked through life with a flair of elevated importance above those around her. She needed to keep up the act at all times, every movement, word that came out of her mouth, and fashion statement. She had to be noticed. She “was” important.

The irony of the situation was a bit odd. Krystal was currently lying in a hospital bed in a town in Kentucky. Krystal had been passing through Kentucky on a road trip across the country she was documenting on instagram, and she had a bit of an accident. Currently a doctor was flashing a light into her eyes and she was trying to block it with her Ray-Bans.

“I’m Dr. Maslani, I will be your attending physician today. I’m so sorry this has happened to you. I will try to help you, but I need you to remove your glasses.”

Krystal rolled her eyes and took off her glasses and then quickly cooperated with Dr. Maslani so that she could get some food and get out of the hospital as soon as possible.

“Why are you here?”

Krystal thought that was a stupid question. “I’m sorry, I’m not sure what you mean.”

“Can you tell me, why you are in this hospital?”

Krystal thought about the question for a while. She couldn’t remember. All she remembered was that she was traveling and that she had stopped in a small town to get some food.

“Can I please have my phone?”

Dr. Maslani frowned, “Your personal effects are currently being locked up by the security staff in the ER.”

Krystal began to get upset. “I need to make a call.”

Dr. Maslani smiled, “I understand, uh, Krystal… I will um, look into that for you. I think you may be getting transferred to a different part of the hospital, so just sit tight for me, alright?”

Krystal rolled her eyes again, this time visible to the doctor.

“Well, I at least need to eat something. I haven’t eaten anything or had any water for several hours.”

Dr. Maslani signed a form and promptly returned, ” A nurse will be here very shortly with a meal and a bottle of water.”

Krystal was waiting in a blanket in a lounge chair after she had eaten and she was gulping down water by the gallon. Nurses kept bringing water to her. It was like people didn’t’ understand the meaning of dehydration.

It was also getting colder and colder the more and more water she drank. She still wasn’t sure why she hadn’t been released from the hospital, and she was very tired and confused. The nurse gave her some medication with the water that she drank and so she took it.

Then she sat staring at the television. It was football. Krystal hated football.

Some very weird looking people came into the room. They looked like they had been on drugs, or they were homeless. It was weird. Krystal was usually a very social person, but these people were like, not of the same social class as her.

the world is too big to be that small – title WORK IN PROGRESS

hard hats required….

Forwarned was she who entered the house of thee who coveted the attention of all who waited on the power of we.

For those who shallowly dipped their toes into the throngs of sins and songs and woes, they did not care forswear it so, and so it goes the bellows of the mellow yellow fellow.

I waited and wrote and I sang like a rocking boat, and the tides drifted here and there and it felt like infinite cause and passing of time, but time was an illusion of my mind. The growth of the weeds plucked from the gardens of songs of lyres and flutes, the offtunes and offbeats they just made white noise and I hated that, and I swatted at those symphonic players like a fly.



Are you satisfied?

Oh my goodness, it’s that time again.

the time when yet once upon a time I lift the pen.

my fingers reach toward the keys, begin to type,

so many letters pour out, weeping, sweeping across the page, ink, fonts, writing, it’s in the way of what I’m trying to say.

i miss you once again you see, and that’s why I have addressed this love letter to thee. For this queer reason you are the most important thing, I protect you, though you never respond, write, back, give a damn, and everything you do is one-sided, making me come to you.

you are this knightly person, a gentleman of sorts, of higher stature, ego, a maniac, not someone who would be seen with a middle class person suburban girl, someone like me. I’m this odd one eccecntric, I drive everyone away, leave me alone I always say, the phrase of the day, scrabble is your thing, mind games are mine, give me a riddle, and I may never solve it but if it’s romantically related to you and I I’ll sit here overthinking the problem for the rest of my life, you just think about the words I say and why I said then nothing more nothing less, not a deeper thing like what is she thinking about and does she want me right now?

im lying here half naked ready to go but you aren’t here so I’m not satisfied.

i could please myself partially and I’ll try again but the point is until we are together in bed it’s not a win win.

just think about my self awareness. If I saw naked pictures of myself on a tabloid id laugh as long as we were happy, we stayed that way we had each other, through all the dark days. Stop worrying about what you’ll do to me bc you are doing it now, if you don’t stop you’ll always be doing it someway somehow.


i miss you.